It's never going to happen, is it?Why do i feel a strange feeling whenever i finish watching a part of Boys over Flowers?
It's just a weird feeling, it can't be describe.
No matter how hard i try.
Why.
Is it because i just know things like that couldn't and wouldn't happen for real?
Because there is no fairy tales in this world that could ever happen?
agrish.
I'm really that gullible? Or just stupid?
Can i not tell between reality and dreams?
What exactly is wrong? And how do i amend it?
Are there really bestfriends that are that close, that they would seriously care for each other no matter what? that they will help one when it risks the other's life?
Doubt so right, it's just acting. It can never happen.
Yet, i seem to be unable to catch reality, unable to grab hold of what's real and what's not.
The envy i have to be someone i'm not.
The fog that seemed to block my road towards my dreams, suddenly seemed so much thicker, so much so that i can only see that bit.
I'm starting to lose what i'm living for, what i yearn for.
Starting to lose that confidence and determination i once had.
Starting to fall into pieces, and starting to realise that no one is here to guide.
A part of me tells me to let go of the unforeseeable dream, yet another part tells me to hold on.
But the truth is, nothing's gonna happen.
Coz i'm not working hard, i'm not even trying.
I can't seem to push myself, can't help myself.
And no one is there to give me a little push, motivation, or words of encouragement to boost my confidence.
I need someone, yet no one seems suitable.
Help. I dream of my dreaded dreams in my sleep, smiling...
But once i wake up, it's the start of a reality that i have to face step by step, second by second.
It's horrible.
If only it can be like the dramas on tv, or something else ...
Well, i guess no one will know the answer... ...
Love, Onew's.
It's never going to happen, is it?